SNL Transcripts: Sean Penn: 10/24/87: Fatal Attraction II

 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 13: Episode 4

87b: Sean Penn / L.L. Cool J, Michael Penn & The Pull

Fatal Attraction II

…..Sean Penn
Alex…..L.L. Cool J

[ open in Sean Penn’s dressing room ] [ the phone rings, as Sean stares at it in horror ]

Sean Penn: [ answers ] Hello! Look, Alex, we agreed that you weren’t going to call any more! No, I don’t love you, Alex, because you’re a very sick person! I feel very sorry for you, but I’m warning you – you bother me again, I’ll call the police!

[ SUPER: “Fatal Attraction II” ]

[ phone rings again ]

Sean Penn: [ answers ] This is sick! Why are you doing this?! [ pause ] Oh.. I’m sorry, honey.. no, I thought it was someone else.. uh, this crank caller.. yeah, thanks, I love you, too. Yeah, I’ll call you after the show. Goodbye. [ hangs up, then dials Security ] Yeah, uh.. if an Alex Forrerst calls, just say I’m not here, and don’t take any messages, alright? Thanks. [ hangs up ] [ Alex knocks on the door, then enters ]

Alex: Hello, Sean.

Sean Penn: Alex..

Alex: I missed you.

Sean Penn: [ stands ] Alex, how did you get in here?

Alex: I told you about my parole hearing, Sean. Why didn’t you come?

Sean Penn: Look, Alex, you’re gonna have to leave!

Alex: No, Sean.. we have to talk about us.. homeboy.

Sean Penn: [ sits ] Alex, I.. I.. don’t think we have anything to talk about.. you were very nice to me in prison, you kept the bigger inmates away from me. I’m very grateful, but that’s as far as it goes – I have a wife!

Alex: Oh, you have a wife now – Madonna, the fabulous Madonna. I guess I’d be a bit of a come-down after her, huh?

Sean Penn: No, that’s not fair.. I mean.. I think you’re a wonderful person. I don’t know, maybe things would be different if I’d met you first, but I didn’t..

Alex: If there’s no chance for us, just say so.

Sean Penn: [ looks at Madonna’s picture, then at Alex, back at Madonna’s picture, then back at Alex ] Could we talk about it after the show?

Alex: I think we’d better. Yeah.

Sean Penn: “Live, from New York, it’s Saturday Night!”

SNL Transcripts

Saturday Night Live: 1987-1988

 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 13: 1987-1988

This free script provided by]]>


  • Dana Carvey
  • Nora Dunn
  • Phil Hartman
  • Jan Hooks
  • Victoria Jackson
  • Jon Lovitz
  • Dennis Miller
  • Kevin Nealon
  • Featuring:

  • A. Whitney Brown
  • Al Franken
  • Episodes

  • 10/17/87: Steve Martin / Sting
  • 10/24/87: Sean Penn / L.L. Cool J, Michael Penn & The Pull
  • 10/31/87: Dabney Coleman / The Cars
  • 11/14/87: Robert Mitchum / Simply Red
  • 11/21/87: Candice Bergen / Cher
  • 12/05/87: Danny DeVito / Bryan Ferry
  • 12/12/87: Angie Dickinson / Buster Poindexter, David Gilmour
  • 12/19/87: Paul Simon / Linda Ronstadt
  • 01/23/88: Robin Williams / James Taylor
  • 01/30/88: Carl Weathers / Robbie Robertson
  • 02/13/88: Justine Bateman / Terrance Trent D’Arby
  • 02/20/88: Tom Hanks / Randy Travis
  • 02/27/88: Judge Reinhold / 10,000 Maniacs
  • SummaryAfter three seasons of unstable casting decisions, returning Producer Lorne Michaels has finally brought the stride back to “Saturday Night Live”. Only three members of his 1985 cast were considered funny and popular enough to bring back for the next season, and 1986’s cast hit such a high-note with viewers that Lorne brought them all back for this season – including an upgrade for featured player Kevin “Mr. Subliminal” Nealon.

    Although no episode left viewers disappointed, the season did come to an early end due to a writer’s strike. Any other great comedy that was to surface would have to wait until the following season. The biggest disappoint of all was the news that original cast member Gilda Radner had agreed to host by season’s end, but now, because of the writer’s strike, was unable to. By the strike’s end, and the next season’s premiere, Radner had to cancel her engagement when she developed the early signs of cancer.

    SNL Transcripts