Cory Chisholm… Taran Killam
Gracelynn Chisholm… Cecily Strong
Daniela Denyada… Scarlett Johansson
Housy Yern… Kate McKinnon
[Starts with WSB/TV ATLANTA video bumper]Female voice: You’re watching WSB/TV ATLANTA. Up next, it’s Right Side of the Bed.
[Cut to Right Side of the Bed intro] [Cut to Cory Chisholm and Gracelynn Chisholm in their set]Cory Chisholm: Good early to mid-morning you guys.
Gracelynn Chisholm: You’re watching Right Side of the Bed. I’m Gracelynn Chisholm and I’m here with my husband Cory Chisholm, better known as the Mirror Hall.
Cory Chisholm: Oh! Someone’s getting shady right off the back. I look in the mirror to practice my sex faces for you.
Gracelynn Chisholm: Cory! It’s not 6 am, you corny horn dog. Would you chill our?
Cory Chisholm: I can’t help but you’re looking crazy sexy cool today. Come here.
[Cory Chisholm is trying to lick Gracelynn Chisholm]Gracelynn Chisholm: Oh, my god! Cory, would you stop! You are knocking my bumping back.
Cory Chisholm: I wanna bump it in your back style.
Gracelynn Chisholm: Cory! Girl, bye!
Cory Chisholm: Look at you thinking you’re all NeNe Leakes.
Gracelynn Chisholm: Would you stop snapping please. You guys, it’s Kentucky Derby week and coming up a little bit lighter, we are going to learn how to make a Mint julep with a help of a really great guest.
Cory Chisholm: That’s right. She is the owner of Tiny Bites. It’s a full service catering company.
Gracelynn Chisholm: Now all the way from New Jersey, It’s Daniela Denyada.
[Cut to Daniela Denyada. She is standing behind a table to prepare Mint Julep.] [cheers and applause]Daniela Denyada: Hi. I got all my ingredients out so I could start whenever you’re ready.
Cory Chisholm: Oh, there she is. What a sweetie.
Gracelynn Chisholm: Oh, she’s as cute as a bird.
Daniela Denyada: Thank you, ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.
Gracelynn Chisholm: Okay Daniela, we’ll be right back with you in two and half shakes to get that recipe.
Daniela Denyada: Alright. I’ll stay right here.
[Cut to Cory Chisholm and Gracelynn Chisholm]Gracelynn Chisholm: Oh, well. I love that accent. She sounds like a talking pizza.
Cory Chisholm: She does. Oh, and I’m excited to learn a new drink coz I’m so tired of fuzzy navels.
Gracelynn Chisholm: Fuzzy navels? Oh, yeah, right. You shave every thing.
Cory Chisholm: Whaaaat?
Gracelynn Chisholm: Yeah, you look like a woman from the waist down.
Cory Chisholm: Well then I guess you’re a lesbian coz you’re bouncing on it err-night.
Gracelynn Chisholm: Cory, please! If you’re just joining us, do not go anywhere coz coming up later, we got Daniela Denyada.
[Cut to Daniela Denyada speaking on the phone]Daniela Denyada: Uh-huh! Uh-huh!
Cory Chisholm: Oh-oh! Looks like we caught her on her cell phone.
Daniela Denyada: Sorry, hang on. I gotta take this call. He only gets one call, alright?
Man: Where are you?
Daniela Denyada: Somewhere in the south.
Man: What are you doing?
Daniela Denyada: That show on TV, you know, the one with the gay guy and his mom?
[Cut to Cory Chisholm and Gracelynn Chisholm]Cory Chisholm and Gracelynn Chisholm: Whaaaat?
[Cut to Daniela Denyada]Daniela Denyada: Look, I- I gotta hang up. I love you. Remember that.
Man: Hey, send me 30 pictures.
Daniela Denyada: Later.
[Daniela Denyada hangs up the phone]Alright, so do I do it now? Or what?
Gracelynn Chisholm: No, not yet Daniela. We’re coming to you real soon there.
Daniela Denyada: Alright, I’ll maintain in this.
[Cut to Cory Chisholm and Gracelynn Chisholm]Gracelynn Chisholm: Alright, I can’t wait to taste that cocktail.
Cory Chisholm: Um-hmm. I can only have lil sip coz bourbon makes me frisky.
Gracelynn Chisholm: Oh, Cory! Chillax!
Cory Chisholm: Oh, girlfriend! I’m just like every other testosterone filled man on this planet. We were put here to get that puny.
Gracelynn Chisholm: Oh, my god! After that, I need a drink. And that’s Daniela’s time. She’s coming up.
[Cut to Daniela Denyada]Daniela Denyada: You ready for me? I already cut the lemons. I’m getting a little agitated here.
[Cut to Cory Chisholm and Gracelynn Chisholm]Gracelynn Chisholm: I mean, she’s just as cute as can be.
Cory Chisholm: Um-um, I know. She is as pretty as Rachael Ray was for a short time.
Gracelynn Chisholm: Cory!
Cory Chisholm: What?
Gracelynn Chisholm: She is gorgeous. You are acting like a tired old ignorant queen.
Cory Chisholm: Well, and you love every inch of it, you stutter bug.
Gracelynn Chisholm: Now, you know what you are. You are like a terrier with a dirty butt. I don’t know whether to give you a bath or give you away.
Cory Chisholm: Oh, I think she’s gonna keep me. [barking] [Daniela Denyada walks in with her cocktails]
Daniela Denyada: I got bored. I made them already alright? Scoot over! Excuse my fingers.
[Daniela Denyada sits on the sofa with Cory Chisholm and Gracelynn Chisholm]Cory Chisholm: Um, omg, you guys! This is like my favorite sex dream. Two women at once.
Gracelynn Chisholm: Cory!
Cory Chisholm: Hey, if anybody wants to go camping, I’m pitching a family size tent over here.
Daniela Denyada: I see no evidence of that.
Cory Chisholm: I’m just saying. You need a camp fire. I got the wood!
Gracelynn Chisholm: Could you stop it! You only know how to go glamping.
Daniela Denyada: Can we drink these already? So I could get back to Marriott? I left my kids in the pool.
Gracelynn Chisholm: Okay, let’s take a break. Take a break! When we get back, more Derby fun with special guest Housy Yern!
[Cut to Housy Yem. He is playing an electric guitar and guitar.]How about that y’all? [Cut to Cory Chisholm, Gracelynn Chisholm and Daniela Denyada] He changed the words.
Cory Chisholm: Oh-oh! I think I found a sculpted nail in my drink y’all.
Daniela Denyada: That’s mine.
Cory Chisholm: I’m keeping it.
Gracelynn Chisholm: Alright, we’ll be back you guys.
Daniela Denyada: What’s the deal with you two anyway?
[Ends]