Stephen… Andrew Dismukes
Trace…Michael B. Jordan
Danny… Bowen Yang
Frank… Mikey Day
Stephen: Okay, guys, thank you for being here to lay down some voiceover for the much anticipated Street Fighter 6 game.
Trace: Excited to be here. Thanks.
Danny: Thrilled to be on board. Whoo!
Stephen: And thanks for coming in last minute, Danny. Our last actor Frank quit due to creative differences. And because I slept with his wife.
Marcello: Argh, actors.
Stephen: I know. So Trace, you’ll be playing Ken, a former US national fighting champ.
Trace: I’m totally in my element. I served for years.
Stephen: And Danny you are a martial artist seeking true strength, Ryu.
Danny: Whoo, love.
Stephen: All right, well, for this first take, let’s just get both of you recording efforts. Taking blows, landing hits, that kind of thing.
Marcello: I’m rolling.
Stephen: And action.
Trace: Uh, ugh, ah, hah, hai-yah, urghh.
Stephen: Yes, that’s great. Danny, let’s get the same from you.
Danny: Okay. Whoo! Wohoo! Ah-woo! Yay! Whoo!
Stephen: Let’s cut. Let’s cut.
Danny: That was really fun. Thanks for letting me play.
Stephen: Yeah, so I guess we were looking for more grunts, you know? You’re fighting, you’re in pain.
Danny: Oh, I see. [looking at Trace] So maybe do it like you’re fighting or you’re in pain.
Trace: Okay, got it. Got it. Got it.
Stephen: No, no, Trace. You don’t need to change what you were doing. But Danny, maybe it’s more aggressive, animalistic, that kind of thing.
Danny: Hmm, yes, Chef.
Stephen: All right. And Action.
Danny: Wouf! Wouf!
Trace: Hoof! Hoof!
Stephen: Cut. Okay, no. Trace, don’t match what he’s doing.
Trace: Oh, okay. He’s just an amazing scene partner. So.
Danny: Thank you. And I was just taking your note. You said to do animals.
Stephen: Yeah, but I said a bunch of stuff before that.
Danny: Well, I have auditory recency bias. So you can’t say that to me. I could sue you.
Trace: Okay guys, guys. Please don’t fight. It reminds me of the war and of fighting.
Stephen: You know what? Let’s just move on. We need to get these quick verbal phrases to say during the fight. And action.
Trace: Take that.
Danny: Hey, I like your necklace.
Trace: What? This old thing? Thanks.
Danny: See? Kindness wins.
Trace: You’re right. Let’s not fight it.
Danny: Yay, I forgot to ask. What are your pronouns?
Danny: I’ll tell him. Ken is he/they.
Stephen: Guys? We can’t use any of that.
Danny: Aww, that makes me sad. Is there a reason?
Stephen: Yes, it’s because no one sounds like that when they fight.
Trace: That’s actually not true. I mean, you remind me exactly as someone I served with in Iraq.
Danny: Oh, you went to Iraq? Where did you stay?
Stephen: Dan! Didn’t want to say this, but you just need to play a more hetero.
Danny: Okay, you should have just said that in the beginning. I got it. Let’s roll. Hey, brother, Ken, biceps looking huge.
Trace: You looking pretty swole yourself, bro.
Danny: I saw you changing in the locker room, but I was completely soft my dude.
Trace: How the hell do you know my name?
Danny: Hey, easy brother. My wife’s on this app.
Stephen: What are you talking about? This isn’t an app.
Danny: It’s a video game? Well, then brother. I’ll race you to the GameCube brother.
Stephen: What? Danny, Dan. Answered me honestly. Do you really think you would sound like this in a real fight?
Danny: Yes, I would brother.[Frank walks in]
Stephen: Oh my god. Frank. What are you doing here?
Frank: I told you I’ll kill you for sleeping with my wife.
Trace: No. I’ll protect you. [pushing Frank] Ugh!
Danny: [hitting Frank] Whoo!
Trace: [slapping Frank] Ugh!
Danny: [pushing Frank] Meow!
Male voice: KO!
Stephen: Well, I’ll be damned. You two just saved my life.
Danny: No, Stephen, Ken and Ryu saved your life.