Nick Cannon… Chris Redd
Mark Summers… Alex Moffat
[Starts with Nick Cannon and Mark Summers in the show set]
Nick Cannon: Welcome to Behind the Slime. Look back at the history of Nickelodeon’s iconic green goo. I’m Nick Cannon, former star of all that.
Mark Summers: And I’m Mark Summers, former host of Double Dare, Super Sloppy Double Dare, and the Ill Fated Dirty, Nasty Hardcore Double Dare.
Nick Cannon: Ha-ha. America was introduced to Nickelodeon’s famous slime when the Canadian kids comedy show “You can’t do that on television.”
Mark Summers: Green Slime would rain down on anyone who said the phrase “I don’t know”. But as you’ll see, it took them a while to figure out the consistency.
Nick Cannon: Head’s up. This show was made in Canada so those kids are white as hell.
Mark Summers: Okay, let’s take a look.
[Cut to a video clip aired on March 20, 1980. Christina walks to Tracy.]
Christina: Hey, Tracy.
Tracy: Oh, hey, Christina. You get a Rubik’s Cube?
Christina: Not really. I’m colorblind.
Tracy: Wait, you’re colorblind? And your parents are divorced? No wonder you don’t have a boyfriend.
Nick Cannon: Again. This was from 1980 when TV was crazy.
Christina: You know, I’ve always wondered, who exactly is this Rubik guy?
Tracy: Huh! I don’t know. [Green slime falls on her head] Ow! Oh my god. That as like, concrete.
Christina: I can’t believe you said “I don’t know.” Oops! [a bucket falls on Christina’s head] Ouch! Geez. What was that?
[Becky Ball walks in]
Becky Ball: Hey, sorry. Little bastard kind of slipped out of my hands. Yeah, slime’s too damn thick.
Nick Cannon: Ha-ha. Fun fact, that woman with the busted his hair cut his slime’s creator, Becky Ball.
Mark Summers: Uh-huh. The early days also saw experimentation in the methods of sliming as seen in this clip from another early episode.
Nick Cannon: Ha-ha. You’re so damn funny, Suzanne Summers.
Mark Summers: Oh, it’s Mark. Mark Summers.
Nick Cannon: Ha-ha. Whatever.
[Cut to another video clip. Marcy walks to Craig]
Marcy: Hey, Craig.
Craig: Hey, Marcy. You know, this spider man comics got me thinking, you’d be a good superhero. Stuffs-her-bra Woman.
Marcy: Well, you can be my sidekick, the Incredible Homo!
Nick Cannon: 1980!
Craig: I prefer super Craig.
Marcy: Oh, and what’s super Craig superpower?
Craig: I don’t know. I guess– [green paint just bursts on Craig] Jesus Christ.
Marcy: Ha-ha. Looks like super Craig’s powers being slimed! [green paint bursts on Marcy too] Oh! why did they do it to me?
Craig: I don’t know. I mean, what’s happe– [green paint just bursts on Craig] Stop. Stop. Help me. Stop. Stop. Feels like needles in my face.
Becky Ball: Hey, I’m sorry about that little man. That issue is fixed and it won’t happen again.
[green paint just bursts again]
Craig: Please stop. We’re begging you.
Mark Summers: Huh! Well, This season second the last episode show the grammar of the slime we know today. But there were still some issues to iron out. Slime is one sticky business.
Nick Cannon: Ha-ha, hell yeah. Just like having 18 kids by 20 different women. I’m losing my head.
Abby: Hey Pat, hey Matt.
Matt: Geez, what’s wrong with you, Abby? Are you on your period or something?
Pat: Nah, she’s probably just upset because she’s adopted.
Nick Cannon: I mean, do I gotta say it?
Mark Summers: 1980.
Nick Cannon: They know, man.
Abby: I have a question. Are you dweebs ever not annoying?
Matt and Pat: I don’t know. [The slime fall on their heads]
Matt: Okay. Alright. Alright.
Pat: A little hard to breathe.
[it’s still pouring on them]
Matt: I know. I feel like you can stop.
Pat: What percent dead are we right now?
Matt: Is it okay to get it in your mouth?
Pat: Go ahead and stop probably. I think we can stop now.
Matt: I feel like you got it at this point.
Pat: Oh, god.
Matt: [yelling] Please, stop. Please!
Nick Cannon: After that episode, the slime time was shortened from six minutes to five seconds.
Mark Summers: Ha-ha. Stay tuned. After the break, we’ll be joined by one of the Petes from the Adventures of Pete and Pete spoiler, it’s Pete.
Nick Cannon: But not that one. Not the one you’re thinking about.