• 1996

    Collette Reardon

    Collette Reardon Collette Reardon…..Cheri OteriDon…..John Goodman Collette: Hi. I need to get some… prescriptions filled. Where’s Cliff? Don: Uh, Cliff’s at lunch. I’m Don. Wow, that’s a lot of prescriptions. Let’s see what we have here. Percodan, 1000 mg, 500 count? Collette: Boating accident. Bruised my arm. Dr. Randazo thought I just need to take some Bufferin. For the bruise. But I sensed a touch of bursitis, so, better safe than—well, you know the rest. Don: So, are you taking any other medications? Collette: Well this morning I was feeling a little sluggish, so I popped a handful of Benzadrine, to get a jumpstart, you know, just a quick pick-me-up.…

  • 1996

    Weekend Update with Norm MacDonald

    Weekend Update with Norm MacDonald … Norm MacDonaldDominican Lou … Tracy Morgan… Will Ferrell [Music. Graphic reading WEEKEND UPDATE / NORMMacDONALD] Don Pardo V/O: Weekend Update with NormMacDonald! [Applause. Dissolve to Norm at the WU desk, basking inthe applause. He removes the clip from his sheaf ofpapers and clears his throat.] Norm MacDonald: Thanks. I’m Norm MacDonald andnow the fake news. Our top story tonight: In court documents made public this week, independentcounsel Kenneth Starr told a federal judge thatHillary Clinton is now a, quote, “central figure” inthe Whitewater criminal probe. Reacting to the news,President Clinton called the investigation “a partisanwitch hunt,” vowing, quote, “If the First Lady issomehow convicted…