Vanessa Bayer
Kyle Mooney
Metalia… Ronda Rousey
Gazina… Cecily Strong
Solar… Jay Pharoah
Aviana… Leslie Jones
Noodle Man… Pete Davidson
Mr. Leathers… Taran Killam
The Beast… Kenan Thompson
Queen of Quata… Aidy Bryant
Koos-koos… Sasheer Zamata
[Starts with giant robots destroying the city in Metro City – 2016.]
Vanessa: Maniac has unleashed his cyber beasts all over the city! We’re doomed.
[Cut to Vanessa and Kyle looking from the roof]
What are we going to do?
Kyle: It looks like the end.
[Hero entrance music playing]
Vanessa: Look, what’s that?
Kyle: I think help has arrived.
[Cut to the Super Crew. They all have their super hero costume on.]
Super Crew: Fear not friends, the super crew is here to save the day.
[Cut to Vanessa and Kyle]
Vanessa: Thank god. The city is in trouble. Can you help?
[Cut to Metalia]
Metalia: Of course we can. I am Metalia. I can bend metal with my mind.
[Metalia pulls out a metal pipe and bends it using her power.]
[Cut to Vanessa and Kyle]
Kyle: That’s gonna work great against these metal menaces. Go get em’!
[Cut to Super Crew]
Gazina: Hang on, coz you know there’s more here than just her and it’s really only fair for each to get an intro, okay?
[Cut to Vanessa and Kyle]
Kyle: Oh, okay. I’m sorry. Go ahead.
[Cut to Solar]
Solar: I’m Solar! I can harness the power of the sun to melt any material.
[Cut to Vanessa and Kyle]
Vanessa: Great! You can melt the robots right now.
[Cut to the Super Crew]
Gazina: Yeah, and I think he probably will do that after we meet everyone.
[Cut to Vanessa and Kyle]
[Cut to Aviana]
Aviana: I am Aviana. I’m gifted with the power of flight.
Kyle: Awesome.
Aviana: But only as fast as you can walk and only for 2016 seconds at a time.
[Cut to Vanessa and Kyle]
Vanessa: That’s great.
[Cut to Aviana]
Aviana: I can do it twice a day.
[Noodle Man walks in]
Noodle Man: I’m Noodle Man. I can create a mountain of noodles to smother any fall. It’s noodle time.
[Noodle Man starts dancing]
[Cut to Vanessa and Kyle]
Kyle: I think honestly we could get the job done with just the heat man and metal lady.
[Gazina walks in]
Gazina: Okay, can I talk to you for just a second? We don’t know each other very well but the more you interrupt this, the longer this is gonna take.
Vanessa: Okay. Um, how many are there total?
[Cut to Metalia]
Metalia: Like, between six and 30.
[Cut to Mr. Leathers]
Mr. Leathers: I’m Mr. Leathers. At any moment I can be wearing leather. Oh, I have it on now.
[Cut to Vanessa and Kyle]
Vanessa: Okay, I don’t see how that helps.
[blasting sound]
Kyle: Oh no! I think they attacked the orphanage.
[Cut to everybody. Aviana is flying.]
Aviana: Look, I’m flying.
Vanessa: Well, don’t waste it. Now you can only use it once more.
Aviana: No, this was the second time.
Kyle: Then what else can you do today?
Aviana: I’m not sure.
[The Beast walks in]
The Beast: I’m The Beast. [roars]
[Cut to Vanessa and Kyle]
Kyle: Now we’re talking.
The Beast: Yes! Because [Cut to The Beast] I’m obsessed with Beauty and the Beast.
[singing] a tale as old as time
[Queen of Quata walks in]
Queen of Quata: Hah! I’m Queen of Quata! I command the seas. But the question is will they obey? An the short answer is no.
[Cut to Vanessa and Kyle]
Vanessa: Okay, so you can’t do anything?
[Cut to Queen of Quata]
Queen of Quata: I just love the beach. And I can eat sand and so far it hasn’t hurt me.
[Gazina walks in]
Gazina: I am Gazina. I have gay-dar but only for black men. Alert! One here is.
[Cut to The Beast and Solar]
Solar: I am? Oh!
[Koos-koos walks in]
Koos-koos: I don’t really have to go coz I’m very similar to Mr. Noodles, but my name is Koos-koos if that helps.
[Fire-butt walks in]
Fire-butt: And I’m Fire-butt.
[Cut to Vanessa and Kyle]
Vanessa: Great! We think all of you are great.
Kyle: So now you can probably save the city, right?
[Cut to Metalia]
Metalia: I’m on it.
[Metalia using power sound]
[The robots are melt down.]
[Cut to Vanessa and Kyle]
Kyle: Metalia saved the day!
[Cut to Gazina]
Gazina: I’m sorry. Who saved the day?
[Cut to Vanessa and Kyle]
Vanessa: Okay. We mean the Super Crew all together equally saved the day as a unit.
[Cut to Super Crew]
Super Crew: Yes!
[The End]