SNL Transcripts: Snoop Dogg: 05/08/04

 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 29: Episode 19

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Air Date:


Musical Guest:

Special Guests:


May 8th, 2004

Snoop Dogg

Avril Lavigne


Rumsfeld ResignsSummary: When Donald Rumsfeld (Darrell Hammond) resigns, his love is missed by President George W. Bush (Will Forte) in the style of the “Friends” finale.

Recurring Characters: George W. Bush, Donald Rumsfeld.



Snoop Dogg’s MonologueSummary: After a flamboyant entrance, Snoop Dogg asks viewers to knock it off with the schnizzle talk.

Also Appeared: 93p

Note: Snoop Dogg was a fill-in for an unannounced host who dropped prior to the show’s announcement.

Mom JeansSummary: The jeans with the shapely fit that says you’re a mom, not a woman.

Note: Repeat from 05/10/03.

¡Show Biz Grande Explosion!Summary: Ferecito (Fred Armisen) teaches Snoop Dogg how to do jokes.

Recurring Characters: Ferecito, Manuel Pantalones.


Rapper Face-OffSummary: Wheelchair-bound rapper (Snoop Dogg) elicits sympathy during a rap showdown.

Scheinwald StudiosSummary: Much to Brad Scheinwald’s (Seth Meyers) chagrin, Grandpa Abe (Rachel Dratch) is eager to produce Snoop Dogg’s “Booty Hotel” movie.

Recurring Characters: Brad Scheinwald, Abe Scheinwald.


ABC Fall PromoSummary: Gross makeover shows will dominate the Fall schedule on ABC.

Snoop Misses “Friends”Summary: Snoop Dogg’s homeys (Finesse Mitchell, Kenan Thompson) don’t share his love for the “Friends” sitcom.

Avril Lavigne performs “Don’t Tell Me”Also Appeared: 02i.

Weekend Update with Jimmy Fallon & Tina FeySummary: Lynndie England (Rachel Dratch) is Weekend Update’s “Dirtbag of the Week.” Bill Clinton (Darrell Hammond) thinks he’ll end up taking the blame for the Iraqi prisoner scandal instead of President Bush. Jimmy Fallon looks back on his musical performances at the desk over the past few decades.

Recurring Characters: Jorge Rodriguez.


Appalachian Emergency RoomSummary: Still more medical mishaps among the trailer trash society.

Recurring Characters: Receptionist, Percy Bo Dance, Netti Bo Dance, Tyler.

TV FunhouseSummary: Rob Smigel’s “Pothead Theater” lets potheads choose what they can see on television.


Duster’s DigestSummary: The magazine that stays focused on the lifestyles of PCP users.

Avril Lavigne performs “My Happy Ending”

Snoop’s Mother’s Day MessageSummary: Snoop Dogg reflects on coming out of his mother’s womb with a poem.



Dress Rehearsal Cuts

Zings vs. SnapsSummary: Dave Clinger (Seth Meyers) and a fellow brain surgeon (Snoop Dogg) trade insult.

Recurring Characters: Dave Clinger.

Note: This sketch is revised for next season’s Queen Latifah episode.

E! True Hollywood StorySummary: The true story about Ike (Snoop Dogg) and Tina Turner (Maya Rudolph).

Recurring Characters: Ike Turner, Tina Turner.

The Blow OffSummary: Will Forte is the undisputed whistling champion, until Snoop Dogg arrives.

Da ApprenticeSummary: Snoop Dogg stars in the gangster version of “The Apprentice.”

“The Adventures Of Harold”Summary: T. Sean Shannon film follows the adventures of a 12-year old bald boy at school.

Note: This film finally appears on the next episode, hosted by Mary-Kate & Ashley Olsen.

Bush in OneSummary: A shirtless President George W. Bush (Will Forte) discusses the Arabs.

Recurring Characters: President George W. Bush.

SNL Transcripts

Saturday Night Live: 2003-2004

 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 29: 2003-2004

This free script provided by]]>


  • Rachel Dratch
  • Jimmy Fallon
  • Tina Fey
  • Will Forte
  • Darrell Hammond
  • Seth Meyers
  • Chris Parnell
  • Amy Poehler
  • Jeff Richards
  • Maya Rudolph
  • Horatio Sanz
  • Featuring:

  • Fred Armisen
  • Finesse Mitchell
  • Kenan Thompson
  • Episodes

  • 10/04/03: Jack Black / John Mayer
  • 10/11/03: Justin Timberlake
  • 10/18/03: Halle Berry / Britney Spears
  • 11/01/03: Kelly Ripa / Outkast
  • 11/08/03: Andy Roddick / Dave Matthews
  • 11/15/03: Alec Baldwin / Missy Elliot
  • 12/06/03: Rev. Al Sharpton / Pink
  • 12/13/03: Elijah Wood / Jet
  • 01/10/04: Jennifer Aniston / Black-Eyed Peas
  • 01/17/04: Jessica Simpson & Nick Lachey / G-Unit
  • 02/07/04: Megan Mullally / Clay Aiken
  • 02/14/04: Drew Barrymore / Kelis
  • 02/21/04: Christina Aguilera / Maroon 5
  • 03/06/04: Colin Firth / Norah Jones
  • 03/13/04: Ben Affleck / N.E.R.D.
  • 04/03/04: Donald Trump / Toots & The Maytals
  • 04/10/04: Janet Jackson
  • 05/01/04: Lindsay Lohan / Usher
  • 05/08/04: Snoop Dogg / Avril Lavigne
  • 05/15/04: Mary-Kate & Ashley Olsen / J-Kwon
  • Summary   “Saturday Night Live” began its 29th season on October 4th, 2003. Cast members Chris Kattan and Tracy Morgan left the long-running series and their long-running tenures, leaving long-running performer Darrell Hammond to begin his 9th season with “Saturday Night Live”. Though both Kattan and Morgan left the show, they would make enough cameo appearances thoughout the season to qualify as honorary featured performers. Other changes include a new opening sequence, a brand new host and musical guest stages modeled after Grand Central Station, and an impression of President George W. Bush that changes hands twice during the season. The season tailored itself for the M-TV crowd, infiltrating a host line-up that included stars of the day like Justin Timberlake, Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey, and Christina Aguilera. The season was also marred by continued (and one might wonder forced) on-air crack-ups between Jimmy Fallon and Horatio Sanz, Weekend Update’s focus on entertainment news and personal opinion taking preference over current events humor, and the mysterious disappearance of Jeff Richards mid-season. The best sketches of the season belonged to Will Forte, though they sometimes had a tendancy to become buried in mediocre episodes (Halle Berry, anyone?). Elsewhere, Jimmy Fallon’s decision to leave SNL hit some fans harder than the news of Will Ferrell’s departure, while leaving other fans wondering if Tina Fey would seek a replacement for Fallon on Weekend Update, anchor the segment alone, or resign the desk to new talent altogether. All in all, SNL was again falling on weak knees by the time it reached the end of the season prepared for its upcoming 30th anniversary.

    SNL Transcripts