Angelo Christmas

Chris Redd

Cecily Strong

Doug… Mikey Day

Angelo… Aristotle Athari

Deb… Billie Eilish

[Starts with Chris singing on the stage]

Chris: Hark, the herald angels sing
Glory to the newborn king

Yeah!

[ Cheers and applause ]

Cecily: Wow! That was beautiful.

Doug: [flirting] Almost as beautiful as you.

Cecily: Oh, shut your ugly, stupid mouth.

Chris: Now, folks, we do have a surprise guest tonight. Well, ladies and gentlemen, international singing sensation, Angelo!

[ Cheers and applause ]

Cecily: Oh, my God! Oh, my God! It’s Angelo

Doug: Wait. Who’s Angelo? I’ve never heard of him

Cecily: He just takes a word from the audience, and then songs just flow out of him.

Doug: Oh, okay, cool.

Angelo: Hello, everybody. Merry Christmas for this. Can I get one word?

Cecily: Oh, you go, Doug.

Doug: Uh, sweet. Okay, maybe something Christmasy. Eggnog.

Angelo: Say for me?

Doug: Eggnog!

Angelo: S-Say for me?

Doug: [shouting] Eggnog!

Angelo: Eggfalbalfalcalvaras.

[singing gibberish]

If I ever sing like that for me like this like that
If I ever sing like this for me like this tonight

Thank you for this.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Cecily: My God! What a daring, brave artist.

Doug: Daring?I didn’t really understand what he was–

Cecily: Shut up, Doug! He’s starting.

Doug: Okay.

Angelo: Can I get another word, please?

Cecily: Doug, come on, do it.

Doug: I don’t know.I don’t think I get what he’s doing. Can he do other songs, like “Jingle Bells?”

Angelo: Say — say for me?

Doug: I said, “Jingle Bells.”

Angelo: Jingfarballafalbalas

Doug: Okay, so he heard “Jingle Bells.”

Angelo: If I ever sing like that for me like that for me
If I ever sing like that for me tonight

Thank you for this.

[Cheers and applause]

Cecily: His gift to the world is his music.

Doug: His gift is saying, “Tonight.”

Angelo: Now I bring sing for this.

[Deb walks in.] [Cheers and applause]

Cecily: Whoa! Okay, this is huge. It’s Reykjavik’s very own, the toast of Iceland, Deb.

Doug: Deb? What is this?!

Cecily: It’s called culture, Doug! Read a book.

Deb: First thing, I need one word.

Angelo: Yes, one word.

[Cecily is looking at Doug for the word]

Doug: Oh, my God. Fine. Mistletoe!

Deb: Say it — Say it for us.

Doug: I am! Mistletoe!

Angelo: Mislefarvos.

Deb: Mislefarmis.

Check, one, two
A little louder, Gary.

Thank you.

Doug: That was it?

Cecily: Angelo and Deb. I feel like I could actually cry.

Doug: I think she just sound-checked her mic and —

Cecily: Doug, Doug, do you have gunk in your ears?

Doug: No.

Cecily: “Check, check.” She’s checking on you and on all of us during a pandemic, Doug.

Doug: What? And who is Gary?Is that their tech guy?

Cecily: Gary is all of us, moron!

Doug: What?!

Angelo: Another word.

Deb: One suggest, please.

Angelo: Another one word.

[Cecily is looking at Doug for the word]

Doug: Stop looking at me like that! They’re just going to mess it up anyway. Frugal boogle.

Angelo and Deb: Frankincense.

Doug: Okay, at least that’s a word.

Angelo: I know that
if ever say
Light is for this
I never have

Deb: Check, check, mic check

Angelo and Deb: Little little little louder Gary
Little little little louder Gary
Tonight.

Deb: Thank you for this.

Angelo: Thank you for this.

Doug: Oh, my God!I was wrong! Angelo and Deb are incredible! God bless us, everyone! Ha ha!