Colin Jost
Michael Che
Omarosa Manigault Newman… Leslie Jones
[Starts with Michael che. There’s a picture of Omarosa Manigault Newman at right top corner.]
Michael che: It was announced that Omarosa Manigault Newman was fired from her White House job, whatever the hell that was. My guess is secretary of the sunken place. But Omarosa’s firing did prompt this outcry of support from black women.
[Cut to video clips of black women in TV news not being supportive to Omarosa Manigault Newman]
[Cut to Michael che]
Michael che: Man, when you get a bye from Robin Roberts, you know you suck.
[Omarosa Manigault Newman walks in]
Omarosa: Uh-uh! That is not accurate.
Michael che: Oh my! Omarosa? You’re still here?
Omarosa: Yes, Michael Che. And I demand a retraction. I left that job by choice.
Michael che: So you weren’t fired and forcefully removed from the White House?
Omarosa: That’s right. I quit.
Michael che: Okay.
Omarosa: I deactivated my ID card. I changed the locks on my own office. I escorted myself off the premises. And then, I threw myself into the bushes.
Michael che: Oh, is that so? Really?
Omarosa: Uh-huh.
[Security walks in]
Security: Let’s go, ma’am.
Omarosa: You can’t throw me out because I quit!
Michael che: You quit what? You don’t work here.
[The security is holding Omarosa’s arm.]
Omarosa: [to the security] Yeah, you better take my arm because I’m escorting you out of the building. And you better throw me into the Christmas tree.
Michael che: Omarosa Manigault Newman, everybody. Thank you. Unbelievable.
[Cut to Colin Jost. There’s a picture of Burger King logo and police car at left top corner.]
Colin Jost: [laughing] She wants to get thrown into the Christmas tree. Okay. Police in Illinois arrested a man for drunk driving after he crashed his car into a ditch and told officers that his name was Burger King. Police then took out their tasers and had it their way.